Max the magician from Bangkok - Bangkok 18/05/2013

I met Max on the night out with Scott and Rupert he was working at the club performing magic tricks. I didn't remember him at first but he refreshed my memory about how he had made me take off my singlet and then magically put a lit cigarette through it with out so much as a hole or burn mark. I recalled how amazed I was at how SICK-AS-FUCK (in a good way) his card tricks were and how even though there was a language barrier every female in the room had stopped what they were doing and now had their eyes completely fixed on Max. Scott the USA hombre could have taken a leaf out of Max's book and maybe the German would have been up for it.

Anyway I digress. Max approached Caro and I in the street, it turns out he was also a restauranteur, a dog trainer and a pretty mean moon-walker. 
We sat down at Max's restaurant and ordered a couple of beers and watched a few tricks, when this black, completely tinted, pimped out, lowered Toyota people mover with shiny chrome spinning rims rolls up. The side door slides back and a bug eyed pug chihuahua type thing in a baby seat falls out of it and onto the road. Max stopped what he was doing immediately and whisked this grotesque looking animal to the back of the eatery, clearly worried his patrons may lose their appetite. Caro, being an animal lover of the highest order, lost her shit and had to have another look at this thing. Max, always the showman, decided to show my wife what this bung-eyed beast could do. For a string bean (yes a bloody vegetable) this dog would walk the length of the restaurant on its hind legs with its front paws in front of it like a zombie! Very impressive! 

Mate Rating:
Max - your slight of hand and entrepreneurial flair really struck a chord with me. Your dog training skills are some of the finest I've seen, however your dog made me feel gross and for this reason I can only award you 7/10

Scott & Rupert from USA - Bangkok 17/05/2013

We met Scott and Rupert in Bangkok on our second night. They both go to College in Arizona and both wear running shoes with ankle high socks. Caro and I partied with these guys all afternoon until I had to do the responsible thing and take Caro back to the hotel and put her to bed as she was a bit too drunk. Once I had put her to bed I slicked back my hair, checked my look in the mirror and went back downstairs to continue partying with Scott and Rupert.

These guys were pretty good sorts, Scott sporting the hombre styled white singlet was into Hip Hop and meeting foreign chicks we also had a scorpion eating competition (I cheated and still lost). Rupert had served in the US military in Afghanistan, he had the classic Republican gun views and owned a hand gun which he kept loaded on his nightstand. We debated and managed to have disagreements on the loose American gun control laws but managed to move past this and discuss vagina's and sharting at great length. 
On a side note earlier in the day while we were preparing to head out from our hotel room, I heard a noise that sounded very similar to the squeezing of a very nearly empty shampoo bottle. This turned out to be Caro's very first shart. Well done babes!
I managed to introduce these guys to heaps of babes and eventually they were off introducing themselves to chicks without my assistance, I was so proud. Scott spent a good 20 minutes building up the courage to go and talk to a mega hot blonde girl. Before he made his move I gave him this advice: "just go up and say hi, everyone's on holiday and everyone will probably be wanting the same thing as you". He agreed that this was amazing advice chopped his pint of Chang and set off only to be back in 10 seconds completely shot down by a German that didn't speak a word of English. Broken and dismayed he went back to the hostel. Pussy. And then there were two.
From here on in I'm a little hazy on the details however Rupert, it turns out, is as much into mischief as I am, so we found some English "lads" and took the piss out of them for a while, Rupert introduced them to a ladyboy and that's about all.

Mate Rating:
Scott - for wimping out after something as fickle as a language barrier and beating me at scorpion eating 6.5/10
Rupert - for powering on while your mate went home and the great mischievousness you possess, I could award you top marks, however you do wear running shoes out on the town. all in all you could definitely fit in with all my good mates back home 9/10  

Hi and welcome to my blog.

To all my current mates:

I have decided to keep you informed on all the mates I am making while I party my way around the globe. You tend to see and do crazy shit when you're abroad and this can attract many types of 'Mates For The Night' (MFTN). I will keep you all informed of and up to date with all of these MTFN's so you can see if they are cool or not, and on the off chance you meet them you will beable to use my rating system as a tool to decide whether you want out hang out with them.